So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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