I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize