I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize