No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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