Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Randomize
