And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize