Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
