there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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