i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
