East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
