my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
