So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Farmville is her only friend.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize