I think my vagina is haunted
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
