They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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