If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
