yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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