Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize