I just threw up on my dentist
Slut skills are useful in every country.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
