haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
