You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
