pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
