is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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