Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
So gin and wine won't be happening again
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
