We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
