whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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