Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Randomize
