There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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