I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
