Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
