if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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