It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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