Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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