I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Randomize
