He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize