so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
