Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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