i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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