In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize