Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
