Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
