There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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