Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize