Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
She's the barista slut.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I have fence marks all over my body
I came so hard my ears popped.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
