there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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