what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
