Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
