It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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