My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
