apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
