We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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