you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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