Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
There r osticjed everywhere
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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