There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
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